How to Not Kill Yourself

Hi, my name is Rosemary. Sometimes you may feel as though there is no way out. That's how I felt. I tried to kill myself twice. I'm not saying my words will keep you from committing suicide, but it might help. After all, life is about learning and growing, so read on and hopefully my methods will keep you off the deep end.

Step 1:

Admit to yourself just how messed up life is. Grab a pen and paper, even a laptop and just write down every major/minor mistake you've made that has gotten you to a point where you want to kill yourself. It could be not losing weight, not going out with the "nice boy/girl", missing your payments for your bills, even something as small as not brushing your teeth every night before bed. List any and every choice YOU have made and then read through them carefully.

Step 2:

Once you've gone through step 1, write down all of the unforeseen, random circumstances that have led you to where you are now. It could be an unexpected death, an illness, an accident, or even just a simple bump into someone you know. Jot down all these seemingly random occurrences and try to remember what was happening as you were experiencing those things.

Step 3:

Accept responsibility for your actions, your choices and accept that the consequences of those actions are what led you to a path of regret and hopelessness. Then realize that those actions can also be changed to lead you away from that dark path. An example would be weight loss. You chose to not be healthy and active. You can also choose to stop your bad habits and start fresh. In the end it's not what you've done that really makes an impact, it's what you've done lately. Sure some mistakes will take a while to go away, but if you keep thinking or acting in a way where those mistakes have a longer shelf life, you will just keep suffering needlessly. Being proactive and making the good decisions that will lead to better outcomes will make those errors in judgment, even the colossal ones fade away.

Step 4:

After analyzing and seeing what you did and didn't do, know that some things are out of your control. If you completed step 2, you'll notice that perhaps you were making right choices for yourself, but something unexpected happened that slowed down your progress. It's not your fault, you couldn't help it. It's life's speed bumps that, according to your lot life, may happen often, or hardly at all. Sure it's unfair some people are lucky and barely have to deal with any truly negative situations, but that's just part of the whole universal game. "What doesn't kill me makes me stronger.": To a certain extent that old saying is true. Still, it's important in this step to just take a step back, pause and let go of the worry and fear. You could go outside, talk to a friend, have some fun, forget what happened for just a night, even a week. Take this time to really understand what you want to do in life and how you want to do it. Explore, plan and think ahead.

Step 5:

This is the single most important step of all. Once you take a pause from life, from your mistakes, get right back into making the right choices for yourself. I won't lie and say it's easy. It's friggin hard, especially if you think you're just too old, too sick, too stupid, too everything. If you just start, push yourself through the initial moves, it'll get easier, you'll feel better; you might even have a new perspective, a new desire. Go out and get it! It might take a while, you might even get a dozen or more speed bumps, but trust me, if you keep going, repeating the steps, it'll go by quicker and you'll eventually breeze through the "tough times". It's not going to fix things immediately, it's not a certain fix, but it's something I used to get myself out of dying. Hopefully it will help you.

Good Luck,
Rosemary

Hi, if you liked my article, feel free to check out more on a variety of subjects such as How-To, Humor, Entertainment, and Health at http://RosemaryJasmineRivera.blogspot.com

If you want to purchase my book on how I was able to last through my depression and attempted suicide, check out this link at Kindle.

http://www.amazon.com/Can-Your-Passions-Save-ebook/dp/B006ACBBJG

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6974612

To All The Agents Out There

To all the agents and the bullshit platform,

Thanks to this economy a writer like me needs to have a platform (large fanbase) in order to get an agent, let alone get published. In a world where everyone with a computer feels as though they can be pulitzer prize winning novelists (with only attending one writing workshop, I actually earned a degree in Creative Writing) and a query wait time of 6 months, it's no wonder I'm going insane with anger and disappointment. I don't have the money or the linguistic talent to garner fans. A part of me doesn't want to. I don't want fans for the sake of getting my work out there. I want my work out there so people can understand and perhaps relate to my point of view. I am a writer, born and raised in hell and I have a lot to say. My stutter, my lovely disorder that is most annoying when looking for employment, hinders and creates barriers where most people don't have any. And I swear, if I see one more agent that requires solicited material only, I will shoot myself with my water gun, right in the mouth. Oh yeah, I still have a water gun; they're friggin awesome. If you didn't know, you need an agent to have solicited material,or at least someone who knows the person you're querying personally. That's fucking retarded. Why on earth would I need to do that if the agent is supposed to be the person who presents the solicited material to the publisher? What the fuck, so I need an agent to get an agent? Let me guess I need to pay an agent, ot even better, suck their big agent cock, well no, no thanks. If I can't raise the revenue to publish my work professionally and I can't get commercially published, then screw it, I'm just going to make my work available regardless. I don't care if no one buys it, (because at the end of the day I have to survive, so no duh I'm charging) I just want it out there.

There was one person who decided to read my nonfiction book, Can your Passions Save You?. He actually liked it and wanted to contact me to let me know. That meant a lot to me. To know someone could read my story and get something out of it was worth more than getting a yes from an agent. Which by the way, I did get a yes for a query, five months later. I didn't even know she had responded. Who does that? Why would someone wait so long to say yes? Then I sent my book proposal, this time for a different book, and I was waiting and decided to email her, letting her know I won't wait 5 more months to get a yes or a no. She emailed me back the next day, and low and behold she said no. I am so sick of the whole spiel too. “Don't give up.” “Writing is subjective”. Blah, blah, blah, blah. Just say no and be done with it. Say the truth, say you didn't read it past the title because you were drinking coffee and got a phone call from one of your clients asking for an extension on whatever. We all know most agents don't read hardly any of the stuff that is sent to them, they only accept people that have networked with them, establish a platform, or paid them. So it's a joke to me when this agent lady sends me a copy and paste sample email saying the same thing she says to everyone. I know she didn't read my work, but she got upset at what I said so she replied quickly. I believe in my work, but I don't have the money or the resources to get it out there. I don't have any help, no fairy god mother or father to wave their magicks over my head into a protective halo or good luck horse shoe, or even better, an ever-expanding safety net. I only have me, myself, and I; A broken and sad person with at least one person who's liked and read my work. At least I can say I tried, and continue to try, just not as enthusiastically. Oh and by the way, the agent had the nerve to plug her stupid blog. Perhaps I should too.

P.S. All you agents out there, keep doing what you're doing, you're obviously not creating classics.

Toodles,

Rosemary Jasmine Rivera

“Can Your Passions Save You? Series 2: What do Passions Bring You?”

Are you sick to death of your job? Are you one of the many Americans who just hate getting up in the morning and having to deal with whatever day you think you might have ahead? I used to be like you, dreading even waking up. I used to think there was no hope and I could barely go outside to find it. I’m here to tell you there is hope.
Hope is energy. Hope is an unlimited supply of force that propels you forward when nothing was there before. How I got my hope, wasn’t from a pill or my favorite pastry, it was from my passion for writing. My passions are what gave me hope when I thought I had none. Even writing this to you now I feel scared. I’m scared of tomorrow and of what will happen. My hope is the light that pushes that fear away, my hope is fueled by my passions.
Writing is not my only passion. Health, beauty, and the environment are also things in life I feel inspire and motivate me. I try to use them in conjunction with my main passion, writing, to get the most out of my talents. Everyone has talents. You, reading this, may have a talent no one else has. Perhaps you’re the best at this one thing, or good at many things. In my book, Can Your Passions Save You?, I guide you through, step by step, what it takes to identify and harness your passions.
The world is meant to be full of meaning and purpose. When you’ve lost your purpose you feel frustrated, in darkness. Let me help you, through my story, learn to help yourself, push yourself through the tough times. Some things are meant to only be healed through time, the trick is lasting until you reach that point. Your passions will help you last. I can guide you in your search for your passions to truly know what you’re meant to do and how you’re meant to do it. The ride of course, is unknown. You don’t know how you’ll get there, or even when, but with determination and your passions showing you the way, you’ll be able to withstand all the trials and tribulations. All you have to do is spend $5.
I know what you must be thinking, this is a tough economy. Why should you waste $5 on a book when you spend that on food? It’s because food will only nourish your body, my book can help nourish your soul. I don’t sugar coat anything in my story, I tell you the facts, what really happened, and how my passions truly saved me. I wrote Can Your Passions Save You? because I saw so many people out there confused about what to do in life and feeling bored. I wanted to contribute something to this world that could actually benefit people in the long run.
So don’t spend those $5 on a game you’re only going to play for a couple of days, a ringtone you like, or your morning coffee, spend it on something that will work for a lifetime. Ten years from now you can look back at my book, your own life, and see how you’ve grown and changed. You can do anything you set your mind to. I’m living proof. I was a suicidal college dropout. Now, in just three years, I have my Bachelor’s in English, and  I wrote three books, all with no help from anyone, just relying on my passions. Believe in your power, believe in the world, and most of all believe there is hope.

Bless you,
Rosemary Jasmine Rivera

If you wish to purchase my book, please go here.

“Can Your Passions Save You? Series 8: You Say What Now?”

I don’t know about you, but I used to not be very assertive. I was the quiet one who kept saying sorry even when someone bumped into me. I was the good girl who always did what she was told and never questioned anything. Now I speak my mind and let it be known how I feel. How do you think I was able to do that?
Life is pretty simple if you think about it. You live in some sort of shelter, you “hunt” for food, you go to the bathroom, find a possible mate, and maybe reproduce. The problem is we, the human race, aren’t simple. We aren’t like tigers who just live by themselves or monkeys who fight for territory. We are domesticated, social beings who have to talk our way into not only getting what we want, but also helping and connecting with others.That’s where the whole being assertive comes into play.
Being assertive means being clear with your intentions, wants, and needs. There’s no round about way when you’re assertive. You say it like it is without putting behind it, any strong emotions. Some people confuse being assertive with being angry or standing up for one’s self. That’s something different. The key to successfully showing what you want is owning up to the responsibility you have of interacting with another person who has the same goal as you of expressing wants and needs and being able to state without being overly emotional or critical, how you’re going to go about doing it. I’ll give you an example.
Lady A goes to Mr. B at a cafe and asks him for some coffee. She explains she find him attractive and wants to talk. Mr. B doesn’t want to, but also doesn’t want to hurt her feelings. He tries to play it nice and just nods. Lady A takes it as a yes and continues to flirt with him. This gets him upset and he forces himself to realize he has to state clearly what he wants from her.
Mr. B explains to her that although she is a nice, young woman, he does not feel the same way and doesn’t want to talk to her anymore. Even if the woman is offended, she sees his face and body language and understands there’s no point in continuing and leaves. Real life isn’t going to be this easy all the time, but you’ll be surprised how easy it is to get what you want when you clearly state it with tact and honesty.
In my book, Can Your Passions Save You?, I show you how you can learn to be assertive by developing a stronger sense of self. How can you tell people what you want, when you don’t know what you want? Your passions are your fingerprint, they’ll guide you to your true desires and in turn help you have a deeper understanding of self. Tell the world what you want, you’ll be surprised with the outcome.

Bless you,
Rosemary Jasmine Rivera

Click here to buy the book

“Can Your Passions Save You? Series 7: Don’t Believe in Luck”

Funny how when you least expect it, something lucky happens. Yep, you get a package in the mail of a duplicate order of your favorite shirt you just bought online and you weren’t charged twice for it. I’m here to tell you that kind of stuff will never happen if you wish for it. Probability is the name of the game when it comes to certain things, and that is much more helpful to you then expecting some random occurrence. That’s why it’s random, randomness can’t be expected.
Why am I bringing this up? It’s because a lot of people, me included, rely on luck to help us through certain things in life without realizing luck has nothing to do with it. If it’s a test you hope you didn’t flunk even though you didn’t study for, or a chance meeting with Mr. Right at a club full of dirt bags, you just can’t count on luck for bupkiss. I never knew what bupkiss meant. Is that even a word? Luck would have it I don’t have my phone with me to check. See what I’m getting at?
Probability is what some people (like me) mistake for luck. If you know all about probability, you’ll know the trick to getting a desired income with probability is setting yourself up to have the best chances. That means understanding the rules of the game, following them, and acquiring as many resources as needed. A good instance would be, being a chef.
Let’s say you want to be a world famous chef. You see a flier that says win a chance to work for a famous chef, just enter the contest. You sit there and hope that someday you’ll make it, maybe even wish for Wolfgang Puck to show up to your door and say work for his kitchen. Some time passes and nothing happens. You don’t win. Now you’re short $10 and no where close to being a world famous chef.
You’ve had enough of daydreaming and decide to apply for culinary school. You get in and even get financial aid. You work hard and sure enough get a local gig at a new restaurant and become a chef. Then you decide to master a signature dish and ask a famous blogger to feature it. You butter him up, wow him with your skill and he grants your request. Now everyone sees what an amazing chef you are. But that didn’t happen with luck. It happened with probability, it happened with passion.
Can Your Passions Save You is my book that shows you how you can use your passions to never rely on dumb luck again. It’s funny, the minute you stop relying on luck, it just comes to you in the most wonderful ways. Your passions can put you back into the driver seat of your journey and will allow to have those wonderful, dumb luck moments. Rely on yourself and believe in creating your own “luck”.

Remember, life is about dealing with what comes to you. Stop trying to guess what will happen and do it.

Bless You,
Rosemary Jasmine Rivera
Click here for book

“Can Your Passions Save You? Series 6: Return of the Bulge”

Obesity sucks, especially because when people look at an obese person they think, “Man she let herself go.” You don’t want to be like that, no one does. The problem is more and more women are turning to purging and fasting to keep slim. Is it worth that number on the scale? Do you feel like you just can’t control it? I’m here to tell you, you can.
I myself have dealt with Bulimia. It used to get worse the more stressed out I got. Even though I’m still recovering, I learned to be happy with my body regardless of how “big” or “small” I am. Let me tell you, it’s worked. Without being so obsessed with being a certain weight, I managed to keep my weight stable for the past 2 years. I’m not going to lie and say I don’t go back to old habits every now and then, but it’s not as bad as it was before.
One of the ways I was able to curb my disorder was my passions for health and writing. I researched what a healthy diet consists of and I wrote down a lot of the anxieties and worries that were plaguing me. It gave me peace of mind to know I could still get better even though I was so obsessed with the whole binge, purge cycle. When I finally expressed how I felt through writing, it made me have a sense of relief and understanding. I wrote down my thoughts on being thin and how I planned to do it. I even vowed never to be Bulimic again.  I realized it’s not realistic to tell yourself you will never binge or purge.
Life is a constant flow of randomness and uncertainty. You never know what will or can happen. What you can do is set realistic goals so when you regress, it will not be so damaging to you. I remember I used to set insane goals for weight loss. I told myself I would lose 30 lbs in 30 days. I was setting myself up for failure. When the pressure got to me, I snapped and GAINED 5 lbs. Now I tell myself, today I’m just going to be active and eat healthy, who cares if I lose. Guess what, I actually ended up losing a few pounds.
Let me show you how you can identify your passions to at least get you started on developing a stronger sense of self to combat that twisted self image you may have. My book, Can Your Passions Save You?, consists of ten chapters interwoven with my true story to show you how to deal with obstacles, set backs, and self esteem. Have faith you have the power to change your life, because at the end of the day, you’re the one who holds the key. You can be the beautiful person that you already are on the inside, by being kind to yourself on the outside. Show the world you’re a force of light.

Open the door to a better tomorrow by helping yourself today.
Bless You,
Rosemary Jasmine Rivera
Click here for the book

“Can Your Passions Save You? Series 5: Learning When to Let Go”

You just cheated on your diet or skipped class, or even worse, are stuck in a troubled relationship. You’re pulling your hair attempting to comprehend why you’re doing this and you can’t think of anything to explain it. You’re anxious and nervous and worrying about tomorrow. How do you fix it? How can you learn to let go?
I’m not a magician. I can’t instantly relieve your fears or bad habits. I can however assist you in becoming aware of what it is that’s going on. I was there in the same place you are in now, holding on for dear life. I’m here to tell you that when I finally began to let go, it was the proudest moment of my life; it can be the same for you.
The first step to letting go is knowing what it is that kept you hanging on in the first place.
How can you achieve that? Easy, I’ll walk you through it. Imagine the one instant in your life that makes your stomach turn. Each time you even think about it, it creates this heaviness inside you, where you feel tired and apathetic. Pull that memory out and into a box. Now imagine the happiest dream you’ve ever had. One where you felt complete and connected. Take that box holding the bad memory and open it inside the happy dream. When you open it, picture the box containing absolutely nothing.
Why would the box holding your worst feelings about something, contain nothing? It’s because that memory is in the past. It can’t exist anywhere else. If you stay in the past, that memory will be alive as ever and will grow and consume you. But if you put it in a box and move on, it can’t exist anymore. It’ll be confined to that box. What’s so powerful about a box?
Picture the box as your passions. The key that holds the power to confining those dark memories. In my book, Can Your Passions Save You?, I’ll show you through my own experience how to let go of your past and finally move on. It’s going to take a while for that box to have nothing inside, but the first step is the most important. Let me offer you that first step. Change is never easy, but when you get there, it’s the most amazing feeling.
Lastly, don’t be ashamed if you think about your past every now and then. We all look back and wonder, what if? You just have to snap out of it and keep going, no matter what. Let your passions get you there.

So quit holding on to things that are bad for you, and embrace your passions.
Bless You,
Rosemary Jasmine Rivera
Click here for the book.